Keith's January Newsletter

Happy New Year Everyone!

I hope everyone’s year is going okay so far, and that everyone’s heating is working okay? It’s freezing where I am, even with the heating on, so if you’re sitting there with a wooly hat on you have my sympathies, and my understanding.

I’ve been quite busy this month so this is going to be a jam packed newsletter, but don’t worry, there’ll be lots of pictures too (although I apologise for at least one of them, lol).

Where To?

The saga of work continues. I have to be careful what I say on here as it is public, but I have been offered a job in Manchester which I’ve said I’ll take. However, the details remain in flux so exactly when it’s going to happen (for me at least) I don’t know. Now I don’t like flux, it upsets me, so until it’s locked down I’m going carry on as if it’s not going to happen at all, as that’s the only way I know how to be. Extrapolate from that what you will.

I had a little jolly this month to see a friend who I haven’t seen in ages. We went up Glastonbury Tor then we did a walk around Cheddar Gorge, both of which I’ve never done before.

(Oh, and if you didn’t know, I shaved my beard off in the new year, instantly hated it, and now I’m growing it back again, hence the stubbly pic below.)

I learned two things during my visit down south; I’m a bit over-weight and out of shape, and I have a thing for eggs benedict. To lose weight I’ve cut out all kinds of snacks and sugary foods, a lot of frozen foods, gluten as much as possible, and I’ve introduced probiotic food into my diet. And to feed my egg habit I’ve bought an egg poacher and some powdered hollandaise sauce, lol. Now I know those two things may seem contradictory, but if your breakfast/brunch becomes your main meal then that’s fine in my book. It’s when you eat a load of other stuff as well because it “didn’t count” for some reason that you get in trouble.

I’m not trying to gain a six pack or run a marathon or anything, I’m just trying to lose the belly, and so far it’s working. I’ve lost half a stone in a few weeks and it keeps going down. It’s not easy, I am low-key hungry a lot of the time, but it is worth it.

News From The Steam Factory

Writing has been going well recently. I’m up to 23,785 words on Attack Mars!! with some really nice bits of writing and character moments in there. This book could turn out to be a bit of a monster as I’m only about a page into eight pages of notes and already it’s a quarter of one of my previous books. Of course too much story is a good thing to have, it means you can boil it down to the real essence when it comes time to edit, but having a big book will drive up the cost a bit, and that’s not something you want.

Of course with things going so well with Attack Mars!! I decided to break off and fiddle with The Journeyman at the same time as well, because why carry on being successful when you can jeapodise that success by putting it on hold for a day or two?

Actually, it’s not my fault. I was looking at doing a new round of submissions, seeing what needed changing as my current subs package clearly isn’t doing the job, and I thought I’d have a look at the opening pages to see if they could be buffed up a little. There’s been a lot of talk online from editors and agents about voice, an author’s voice, looking for a strong voice, and I wanted to see if my own voice was coming through strong enough?

This is what I did:

Yes I know B has problems, but it also has more voice, and more character. It’s more engaging, more entertaining, and yes you guessed it, I am now into rewrites on The Journeyman, a book that was finished and has already been through two rounds of submissions. Also it’s not called The Journeyman anymore, it’s now called In The Valley Of The Wind, which I think is a much better title and is far more likely to win awards I reckon. When it comes to titles and awards nominative determinism is key as far as I’m concerned.

The good thing about rewrites is they’ll add a few more words which it kind of needs. A 55,000 word book is kinda short, whereas a 57,000 word book is a good length for some reason (don’t ask me why, I don’t make the rules).

As well as all the writing that’s been happening Glunda The Veg Witch has been having a bit of a moment as well. It got tweeted about by The Orkney Public Library, an account with many thousands of followers, after I sent them a copy to put on their library van, Booky McBookface.

Now I can’t say that one tweet resulted in many thousands of sales, but there has been a wee uptick in sales in January, meaning Glunda is riding high in the charts this week - specifically Sword & Sorcery for Young Adults - at number sixteen, just behind a Harry Potter CD but ahead of the Twilight Saga trilogy.

It’d be nice to get to number one but I don’t think that’s going to happen. I’d need a bunch of sales right now to push it up the charts and they are too sporadic for that. Maybe I’ll crack top ten one day but I’m not holding my breath.

When I’m Not Writing

January’s entertainment has been similar to December’s in that I finished the Foundation series on Apple TV (highly recommended), and I just finished the second Red Darkling book Bonkpocalypse, also highly recommended.

L.A. Guettler’s Red Darkling books are great. Well written, easy to read, full of charcater, and they don’t take themselves too seriously which is right up my alley. They’re not perfect, I struggled with some aspects of book one, but those got toned down in book two much to its benefit, and I’m clearly quite vested in the whole Darklingverse as I’ve already bought the third book (above) which is a choose you own adventure type story. Looking forward to giving that a go. From what I understand I’m going to die many, many times, lol.

Right, I’m sorry about this, but here we go…

There’s been some controversy online recently with a male author contacting young female Tik Tok book reviewers and asking them to pose naked with his book covering their private parts. Mental I know, but it does happen. Some people are just creepy AF.

My response to this was to take the piss, of course, so I made this asking “Is this how we’re supposed to promote our books now?”

I know it’s stupid and that’s kind of the point. The author in question never though to contact young men to promote his book naked, and he certainly never thought to do it himself like that, so why did he think it was okay to contact young women and ask them to do that for him? Of course it’s not, but why did he think it was?

Anyway, the backlash was swift and absolute, and he is now trying to pretend like it wasn’t his fault, but the damage is done. His reputation is in the toilet and hopefully other male authors will think twice before making such a request again. They won’t, not all of them, but maybe some of them will have learnt a lesson from all this.

Okay, after inflicting that image on you I wish you all a grand farewell and the best of luck for the coming month. When next we speak I will no longer by in my forties. I should also have tales of celebration with perhaps an escape room victory under my belt. You’ll have to come back next month to find out!

Have a good one y’awl. Toodle-pip for now.

Keith